Spike's Junkyard Dogs, Somerville, MA
Joined by special guests from Sushiesque and Sanskritboy.

Despite yesterday's dismissal of curly fries as violating scientific principles of consistency, we go with the "Poodle Cheese Fries," curly fries with cheese, as Spike's does not appear to have "normal" fries.

J: Initial impressions: positive. (tries one) Initial tasting: cheese free. (grabs another) Ah. Here we go.
G: They smell great.
J: They're well-salted.
G: I think they -- ooh!

C: Verdict?
J: Quite good. They need more cheese, but what doesn't. Also, these are the best veggie dogs I've had in quite some while. (Author's note: G ordered a "Contradiction Dog" without chili, a veggie dog with cheese and bacon. This is on the menu as a regular item.)
G: I'm not sure this is cheddar.
J: Yeah, it tastes like swiss.
R: Is cheddar required?
J: Yeah.
G: Except when in Rome... you can have Tasty Cheese.
J: I miss Tasty Cheese. It was good.

* * *

C: You know, you could buy the URL for cheesefries.com. It would be the top hit for cheese fries. You could make a killing on Google ads.
J: Imagine! We could do interviews with celebrities!

* * *

J: The layering is...
G: Nonexistent.
J: Not acceptable. Round The Clock is still the best, and not just because it was free.
G explains how we skipped on the bill because our waiter clocked out before we were done
J: And I had G convinced I'd gone to cheerleader camp.
G: Just like yesterday, when you convinced me you'd been to church.
J: Which is even funnier.
G: Hey!

* * *

G: The fries are pretty nice even underneath.
J: Yeah, they're even good without the cheese.
G: Oh, there's pepper on 'em.... The buns are good.
J: Yeah, they're not awful like hotdog buns usually are.
G: Normally they stick to the roof of your mouth and they're made of nothingness.
C: Yeah, they're the only reason I can do hotdogs here.
G: They're like bread.
R: It makes it hard to do the Spike's Challenge, where you're supposed to eat over six in an hour and a half. Eating six hotdogs would be one thing, but you're eating six of these buns as well.

* * *

J: I used to hate swiss cheese, but I'm coming around on that. And some other things.
G: Raaaaaiiisins!
J: (cringes)
C: What about raisins?
J: I hate them. I had a bad experience once when I was a kid. I guess the raisins had come all the way up to Alaska from California, or something, and my grandma packed 'em in my lunch, and when I opened the box it was just crawling with maggots.
R: Your raisins were the givers of life!
C: If we accept your clearly inferior philosophy.
J: Oddly, some things are OK with me. Raisin bran is OK.
G: I think raisin bran, I think weevils.
C: Mealworms.
G: Yeah, mealworms live on raisin bran.
J: I think in my mind they cancel each other out. The mealworms eat the maggots.
R: How did you deal with the California Raisins when they were dancing in those ads?
J: Yeah, that actually came out shortly thereafter. Maybe the California raisin board mounted that campaign because I wasn't alone in my experience. I know my third-grade teacher was as grossed out as I was. I don't think she ever ate raisins again either. Anyway, yeah, I responded with rage to the California Raisins.

* * *

Google is hiring everyone we know.
G: Apparently they're set up across the street from the Microsoft campus, where they hire disgruntled Microsoft workers as they leave work.
C: Google is the new Microsoft.
J: Yeah, but they want us to believe they're not. "We're cute! Look how much of our name consists of Os! Os can't hurt you!
J then reveals what she has learned about the top three popular searches on Yahoo. They are apparently "Google," "Yahoo," and "MILF."