I don't really count sheep, but I do need to get my mind off things, so I try to think up alternative game interfaces. And it occurs to me that what with this trend for pole-dancing among suburban housewives...

what we really need is a pole that doubles as a theremin.

Or maybe not. Maybe the whole phenomenon of pole dancing is dorky enough as it is without eerie musical accompaniment. I was half waiting for the announcer in that clip to say "Ohhh jeez" or "you betcha," a la Fargo.